A Quick Visit

We didn't expect to be able to see Caleb, but he was able to come down for a day before heading back to South Carolina. Wes and I also got in a good (but hard!) run at Sugar Hollow. 3 miles topped off with a run up the dam. I have lost some momentum due to my lack of present accountability runners! I haven't felt so sick after running since my beginning runs at Northland, but it was great. And the day was beautiful as well--no sign of the winter storm warning for tomorrow. So much for more running this week. But I'm thankful for one good day. Today has been encouraging in many ways, beyond benefiting from God's creation. I have also become aware of answers to prayer, been reminded of important promises from God's Word and from godly brothers and sisters in Christ, and been challenged to press on to know and love God in deeper ways and also to testify of Him more boldly this year. Being at a secular university will provide many potential opportunities for that. Please pray for me as I depend on God's grace to see these desires become a reality.
Happy New Year!
2 Samuel 22:29-35

Wrist Update

I saw an occupational therapist before Christmas to see if she could detect anything beyond what I know--it hurts the more I play. Yet I have enough inconsistencies with my pain to suggest that there may be something else wrong. After a series of questions and observations, she believes the pain might be resulting from weak upper back muscles. The muscles between my shoulder blades are apparently much weaker than they should be, and than the other muscles in my back which have been compensating. (I guess tae-bo doesn't target everything :) Because of my size combined with the weakness, she said that the nerve cavities running from my spinal cord to my arms are possibly constricting the nerves. The positive thing is that the solution is exercise! She gave me several strengthening exercises to try and said it could be up to twelve weeks before I see the desired results. Whether this is it or not, I'm thankful for the possibility of help. If not, I know God has something better planned than a pain-free semester. Isn't it comforting to have such assurance?!

Home and .25 Completion

I am home after completing my first semester of four. What a 15 weeks! Apart from the confidence that I know I am where God wants me to be, I'm not sure I would be able to look back over the whole and call it a success. From a human perspective, I had many hindrances. But in trusting a sovereign God, I have proved his faithfulness, love, strength, and grace.

Needless to say, I believe I am looking forward to this break very much. It is not as long as Northland's, as I start back January 7th, but the three weeks will be wonderful. I'll be able to be home until I leave for Va Beach to play for a wedding Jan. 5th. Gramps and Gram Olson will be coming after Christmas, along with Charity Chen, a student at Northland who will be spending her break with them. The Davey's will also come New Year's Eve for a few days. I'm hoping to get some good runs in with Wesley as we did last Christmas. If we can't have snow, it might as well be nice enough to enjoy being outside!

I'm sure I will be able to give more information about my spring semester once I start, but I do know that my classes as well as my work will be quite different. I will be taking a theory class called Analytical Techniques, a music history seminar on jazz, and a class piano credit due to my new position as a class piano teacher. This will replace my accompanying jobs. While I will miss the accompanying, I'm excited about being stretched in the department of classroom teaching. From what I know, the course material is well-organized, and all in a folder complete with lesson plans and materials. I believe it will be a good first-experience.

I want Christmas to become more special to me each year, not because of its accompanying break, or even because I can be with my family. Those things are meaningful, but not without the focus on God who came to earth in human form that He might die for my sin, conquering sin and death so that I can live eternally with Him in heaven after my brief life. I easily forget the significance of this truth--yet it is why I am here. My prayer is that the break from busyness will allow for more contemplation on these truths, and result in a life that "walk[s] worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him." Col. 1:10

Merry Christmas!

I Samuel 13: the morality of timing

In reading I Samuel 13 this morning, I was struck by the importance of timing. Samuel had told Saul that he would arrive in time to offer the burnt offerings. Saul waited, and upon Samuel's delay, decided to go ahead and perform the supplicatory act. Right after he finished, Samuel arrived (hmmm...prophet). And in response to Saul's disobedience, Samuel announces God's plan to end his kingdom and give it to another man, one who followed after God's own heart.
God's holiness justifies any seeming injustice or harshness. But what challenged me is the fact that Saul wasn't performing something inherently sinful. In fact, the act itself was one of supplication to God. The sin lay, rather, in the timing. Saul had been ordered to wait. And he didn't.
Even when the timing seems wrong, I must remember that God's timetable is much different (not to mention more perfect) than mine. I can rejoice as I wait patiently, knowing that he will fulfill His will at the right time. Until then, I am to be walking in His will for me right now.
Speaking of day-by-day, I am scheduling my final days of the first semester of grad school! 3 more performances, one recording project with a flutist, and a major listening exam over Beethoven's piano works. Not much left! I hope to be home by Wednesday night or Thursday.
I am so thankful for God's day-by-day strength and guidance. And thank you to those of you who have prayed for me this semester! My arms are not so happy with the extra practicing, but the Lord has been faithful to provide strength as well as times of rest.

Timely Truth

A good truth for a cold and windy Monday:

"The Old Testament believer had joy for God's gifts to him. God's power made things here contribute to him. But the Christian's joy is in heaven and springs from what the Father is to him there. He demands nothing from this world, but in the life of the Lord Jesus he contributes to it, of the grace that nourishes and comforts him outside it." JBS

"Blessed are the people that know the joyful sound; they shall walk, O Lord, in the light of Thy countenance. In thy Name shall they rejoice all the day." Ps. 89:15, 16

Know or not?

A seeming paradox?

"For 'who has known the mind of the LORD that he may instruct Him?' But we have the mind of Christ." I Cor. 2:16

*We can't know:
-"How unsearchable are His [God's] judgments and His ways past finding out!" Rom.11:33
-"'For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,' says the LORD." Is. 55:8

*We can know:
-"But we have the mind of Christ." I Cor. 2:16b

How is this knowledge/(or lack thereof) reconciled?
*"No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from my Father I have made known to you." John 15:15

-We don't know it all--and never will. Yet God in His gracious wisdom has revealed through Christ and His Word all that we need to know for "life and godliness." (2 Pet. 1:3) As frustrating as a lack of knowledge can sometimes be, the lack is not a mistake on God's part. He has promised not to withhold any good thing from those who walk uprightly. (Ps. 84:11b) Everything given, the Spirit helps us further understand the truths as we seek to know Christ more.

Strength in Weakness

"No matter what we may encounter in this life, we who belong to the Lord Jesus have this definite knowledge--our Father will use it all in love as an instrument in the carrying out of the glorious purpose to which He has destined us. If that purpose is to be wrought by delivering us from a trial, He will do so. But if it is to be accomplished by means of the trial, He, in His perfect love, will not free us from it but strengthen us to go through it and be victorious over it." Andrew Murray

What a comforting and energizing truth. Encounters with physical pain, mental conflict, emotional stress, and the other multiple aspects of our humanity allow God to prove Himself Sovereign in love and strength. "Strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy." (Col. 1:11)

Christ knows our weak states, yet calls us to be His ambassadors. What can I represent? Nothing, within myself. Any "strength" or "goodness" of my own does not reflect anything but the earthly, self-focused pursuits that have no eternal value. So how am I to represent Him? Maybe it is through my weakness. When I am weak, His strength shines. Self is removed as my focus moves past what little I think I may have to offer Him to the acceptance of His might in my complete inability. This can be the only true representation of Christ--Him in me, the hope of glory. And because He is in me, I am "strengthened with all might." I cannot imitate, but I can reflect. The more I encounter Christ, both His power and His suffering, the more He will be seen through me. What a privilege in weakness.

Thanksgiving

"For of Him and through Him and to Him are all things, to whom be glory forever. Amen." Romans 11:36

What a great "Thanksgiving" verse, and it doesn't even mention the word! I am very thankful for many things, like beautiful skies and a wonderful family. But the past few days have turned my thankfulness toward truths surrounding God's character.
-His strength is sufficient--the two weeks leading up to Thanksgiving Break were the most stressful of my entire academic career, yet I completed them through a continual awareness of my very real need for His strength.
-His timing is perfect--I don't think I would have been able to withstand the rigor of my responsibilities much longer than I did. Thanksgiving Break provided a necessary respite from school and refreshed me for the final sprint. And I haven't even gotten sick!
Being home with my family was special. Buddy and I enjoyed time at Sugar Hollow Park (I took a picture of him rolling down the grassy dam), and Grace, Dad and I had a great run there Thursday morning. Katie and I got in several rounds of our favorite game, Cribbage, and Mom beat me three consecutive times in Scrabble! Good thing I'm not competitive. . .
In thinking through what I am most thankful for, I cannot narrow my focus without neglecting things for which I am to be equally grateful for. "In everything give thanks...." Can I even be "most thankful"? But present circumstances have centered my thanksgiving around the truth that God allows hardships to make me more like Christ. Everything He does is done out of love. And everything is working to bring Him glory. Because of my natural bent toward self-sufficiency, I am thankful for the weaknesses He exposes in my life that force me to rely on Him rather than myself. No, the process is not the most pleasant, but how much more rewarding than to live a carefree life that bypasses the growth of dependence on God alone!
Romans 11:36 suggests a response of lifelong thankfulness. I desire to have a heart of thanksgiving long past the celebrated holiday. And I am thankful to serve a God worthy of such honor.

Weekend Plans

I leave early tomorrow morning for Norfolk, VA where the annual VMEA conference is being held. (Music Education) Since I am part of the symphony orchestra, which will be doing an afternoon performance, as well as grad. assistant for JMU's music ed. program, (and thus responsible for food and set-up/clean-up for an evening reception), I will have a full day of driving, performing, shopping, and serving. Unfortunately, I don't know how much I will be able to interact with the various music educators, but it will be a good opportunity to see some of what they do. After clean-up, I plan to return home late tomorrow night.
Then for the weekend! I have more to do than seems feasible for the next few days, but I want to anticipate seeing God do what I cannot. My natural self-sufficiency demands His bringing me to the "impossibilities." Yet I desire to live in the dependent state at all times."

A Week of Updates

One more week now in the past. One more week of claiming dependence out of self-inability. And one more week of God's love and faithfulness proved. The past two Sundays I have visited a new church--and been refreshed. We sang Great Is Thy Faithfulness this morning, and heard a great message from I Thess. 2:17-3:5 about having an affectionate love for the body of Christ that is motivated by the confident hope of the Lord's return. (Col. 1:5) Thank you to those who have been praying about more opportunities for my interaction with fellow believers. He is answering in ways that I can trust are best.
Thank you also for praying for my wrists. After cutting back on practice time, this past week went much better. I plan to see a hand therapist over Christmas break, and until then trust that the Lord will provide all I need to faithfully complete what He calls me to.
I haven't talked much about academics, but my classes are going well. Research Methods and its semester paper project has consumed about 90 hours thus far, but I turn in my rough draft on Tuesday, 11.13! My study of Beethoven's last 5 string quartets in light of his severe physical ailments has been extensive, though I feel I have only learned a fraction of what exists. Maybe that is normal!
I am motivated to work as much as I can on my other paper/presentation that is due the Wednesday after Thanksgiving break. I want to be able to enjoy time with my family. So this week I will be immersed in the variations of Beethoven and their influence in Brahms's.
My biggest struggle this past week was dealing with the worldly influences. While I am thankful for the protection the Lord has given me for much of my life, my sensitivity somehow seems to make the impurities stand out more strongly. I find it difficult to replace them with eternal truth, rather than trying to eliminate the earthly. Focus on ridding the bad just makes it more prevalent. But I am thankful for God's Word that is able to renew my mind. I would be grateful for your prayers that I would allow Him to do that unhindered, and that I would continually respond in obedience to the mirror of His Word so that I can be a light to those around me.
"He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it." I Thess. 5:24

Faithfulness Proved

This weekend has been full of evidences of God's faithfulness. A great story could accompany just about every example, but a list will have to do for now. He has been faithful to provide time, but not in excess!
-My wrists, though not healed, sustained supernaturally through my accompanying performance on Saturday. I have since been on "wrist rest" which I believe has been helpful. My plan is to resume playing tomorrow, Lord willing.
-A direct answer to a prayer by a friend in Franklin, VA: I found out that a senior piano performance major in my accompanying class leads a weekly Bible study on Sunday nights with other pianists on music and God's glory. The material comes from the Christian Performing Arts Group based out of Indiana. I hope to attend when it resumes next week.
-Last week, after a clear direction to look for a new church, I visited one this morning that I believe will provide the ability to worship as well as be refreshed -- another specific prayer request answered.
-I have had increasing opportunities to befriend another first year grad student. She notices a difference and has pursued interaction. Whether through running or accompanying or something else, I believe the Lord will use these times to allow me to present the gospel at some point. Please be praying for my discernment in God's timing.
I know many of you have prayed for these things, and others, and I want you to know that the Lord is at work whether each answer is clearly evident at this point or not. I thank you, and I thank my God upon every remembrance of you!

Choosing Perspectives

From the human perspective, circumstances are posing frustration, and timing seems anything but opportune. My wrist pain is spreading into new territories and beginning to noticeably affect my playing abilities. Tomorrow I am to perform with a vocalist for her senior recital, and I have multiple responsibilities with other studio and area performances coming up shortly. The increasingly necessary doctor's visit fits nowhere in my life right now! Neither does rest.
But from God's perspective, I can only imagine things look quite different. While His thoughts are not my own, He has provided His Word as insight into His character and work. As a result, I have the assurance that the multiple weaknesses and seeming hindrances in my life right now are working toward a great end. And I am not left without the strength I need for today. My hope remains steadfast.
"His compassions fail not. They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion,'
says my soul, 'Therefore I hope in Him!'"
Lam. 3:22-4
I am eager to witness how the Lord will prove Himself strong in my weakness. It is a humbling experience to be weak. But the result has far greater and lasting results. Please pray for me, not so much for wrist healing, but rather for my growth in dependence and greater reflection of Christ. Whether He chooses to answer through healing or through a better way, I want to keep His perspective.

Acknowledge

"I thank my God, making mention of you always in my prayers, hearing of your love and faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints, that the sharing of your faith may become effective by the acknowledgment of every good thing which is in you in Christ." Philemon 4-6

We have plenty to acknowledge, at all times, no matter our circumstances. We are complete in Him. He has given us everything we need for life and godliness. He has blessed us with all spiritual blessings. The more we acknowledge, the more effective our witness can be. What will it take to get us to acknowledge our richness?

Eternal Relationship

"And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent." Jn. 17:3

Eternal life is a result of a relationship. So much of what circulates as "spiritual conversation" here is only about religion. Mine is not that. I have a personal relationship with my God because Christ brought Him glory through His complete obedience (Jn. 17:4). This is what I want to share!

Gracious Gift

My devotions went as far as my "Pauline prayer" for the morning. I couldn't get past 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17:

"Now may the Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work."

Paul makes a request, but begins it by stating an already proven truth that validates his request. (I cannot help but begin in praise for the ability to have such confidence in our God!) The initial truth is that Christ and our Father (commentaries explain the verb usage to reveal a unification establishing equality of the Persons) has done two things: 1) loved us, and 2) by grace has given us unending comfort (encouragement) in our present struggles and good (beneficial) hope through the promise of eternity with a victorious Savior.

On the basis of these gifts, Paul can confidently ask his two-fold request: 1) that this same Giver would comfort the hearts of the Thessalonians who had misunderstood through false teaching and become fearful regarding the Day of the Lord (2:1-3), and 2) that He would establish (strengthen) them both in what they spoke (gospel sharing: defense and confirmation of the gospel), and in what they did (gospel living: doing all to the glory of God).

While these two short verses are packed with incredible truths, I was most encouraged by the little phrase "by grace" at the end of verse 16. This is a prayer that is only possible through God's grace. I have no present encouragement, no future hope, no comfort or strength to live and speak as I should without His enabling grace. What praise can I render for such an indescribable gift? I believe He will be most honored if I will respond wholeheartedly to it.

A Timely Break

My break in Va Beach last weekend was refreshing and timely. I was so thankful for the time spent with Grace, with Gramps and Gram, with Kirk Lehner, and the added blessing of seeing Uncle Matt from Northland! The brief but quality time helped me relax, refocus, and even reconsider my purpose here. I'm not ready to quit school, but I am striving to find how the Lord wants me to gain for eternity in everything I do, and not just to store knowledge for the here and now. I did come back from my weekend with some looming questions, but have since had a good talk with my wise mom, and I am confident that the Lord will continue to guide me. I feel somewhat like a pendulum swinging back and forth, but (if the analogy holds) it should continue to narrow its width of extremes.
Thank you to those of you who pray for me. I covet these more than ever as my presently fewer opportunities for spiritual fellowship give thanks for those of the past and confidently hope for the future. I rest in the comforting assurance of God's perfect provision in every area of my life. He Himself is what makes it so. The Giver has provided a Gift that cannot be surpassed.

The Blessings of Fall

Besides being my favorite season, Fall at JMU includes a school break. While this "Fall Break" consists only of a Friday off, it allows for a long weekend which I plan to spend in Va Beach with Grace, my grandparents, and also Uncle Matt. The timing of the respite is of the Lord. This week I have struggled with missing my Northland friends and the spiritual environment that surrounded me there. I have the confidence that the Lord is providing all that I need, but I am having to choose to dwell on unchanging truths rather than past experiences.
Yesterday's devotional in None But the Hungry Heart read, "We never surrender what we value until we find [something] better, and man is so full of himself and his own will that until he finds out the sovereignty of his Father's will he can be neither an obedient nor a suitable servant." It goes on to say that He often teaches us this lesson through trying and painful circumstances. His purpose for this is not our pain, but rather our realization of dependence on Him. What proof of His sovereignty! He does work all things for our good and for His glory. My time here at JMU is working toward these ends, and I can choose to rejoice in this.
And in the meantime, I am exceedingly thankful for the opportunity I have to be refreshed this weekend.

Blessings in the Void

From a musical standpoint, the weekend of travel and performance went well. However, an obvious void loomed as all the attention and focus centered on none but the temporary. From the times of "focus" to comments like "Tonight is about us," the aspect of public praise to the Lord was painfully lacking. But how thankful I am to still be able to do all that I do to His glory, even if only in my heart. And the Lord also put me with two Christian girls on the team for the weekend and allowed us to stay Friday night with a lady who understood musical ministry. These were encouragements to me, along with little things like a walk in the fall leaves before Saturday's performance, finding a penny on the piano, and getting to see my Dad in Richmond. The Lord is so good to continue to bless and encourage as He teaches me.

A Tour to End the Week

I leave tomorrow morning for a mini-tour with the Madison Singers, a 24-voice ensemble I am accompanying this semester. We will be performing twice in Richmond, Va on Friday, and again on Saturday evening in Charlottesville, Va. While it won't be quite like my experience with Northland's Fall '05 Ministry Team, I am thankful for the opportunities I've had and will continue to have to share music with others. My main role with the group is a set of Nocturnes by Morten Lauridsen. But more than providing piano accompaniment, I hope to be a usuable instrument in shining Christ and spreading the message of the gospel. Would you please pray that the Lord would give me grace and boldness to offer myself in this way?

"We will sing and praise Your power." (Ps. 21:13 NLT)
"It is not that we think we can do anything of lasting value by ourselves. our only power and success come from God." (1 Cor. 3:5 NLT)

Sight of Love

"For Your lovingkindness is before my eyes" Ps. 26:3.

The New Living Translation reads, "I am constantly aware of Your unfailing love. David reveals his secret for endurance through adverse circumstances -- perspective. Everything he views comes into focus through the lens of God's love. The characters of circumstance blur in the background drawing attention to the clear image of Sovereign grace.
Without the correct lens, the characters draw too much attention to themselves, detracting from the image that is meant to be accented. Yet the Lord has provided the lens of His love as a means by which we might see every aspect of our lives as an occasion for His glory. Every believer possesses this lens, but must choose to make use of it. Often, the knowledge of its quality and the initial desire for its outcome are soon overpowered by competitors offering deceivingly appealing perspectives.
My lens has been both challenged and put to use this week. The strains of a competitive graduate school at a secular university provide many opportunities to either use or neglect this lense. And my "practice pains" have risen to a new level, but just in time for me to read this verse this morning! I am grateful to the Lord for His grace in allowing me to see His love in my difficulties.

Family Weekend

The coming week's schedule doesn't exactly match the wonderfully relaxing weekend I enjoyed with my family, but I was able to set aside the books and the piano practice just fine and spend a refreshing 40 hours with Dad, Mom, Katie, and Buddy here in Harrisonburg. The Saturday night JMU POPS concert went well -- I joined the symphony orchestra for an exciting performance of four Star Wars movements. Three other music ensembles along with the orchestra provided a very professional but fun evening. The weekend was full of enjoyable things -- like Thai food Friday night, a Scrabble game with Mom, a Cribbage round with Katie, grilling, wonderful coffee with even better people to share it with (thank you, Pastor and Mrs. Kimbrough!), and beautiful weather to enhance it all.
Although I have my first test in the morning, I was reminded how the Lord provides exactly what I need, even if it doesn't match my own ideas. I am refreshed and ready to face my week in the strength of the One who has called me to it.

Good and Perfect Gifts

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning" James 1:17.

Some gifts come packaged and wrapped, but some can't be confined to such, like a beautiful sunset or answered prayer. Some are anticipated, others surprise. Some are small while others overwhelm. As the receiver of a variety of gifts this week, I want to praise the Giver. His goodness is not determined by His gifts. In fact, it seems that His goodness is better realized in the waiting. Yet when He chooses to reveal His goodness through His gifts, He is the One to whom all praise is due. So I must testify of this as I think back through my week. I received gifts such as physical strength to persevere through weariness, emotional strength to deal with pain, energy for a class presentation and performance, a clear answer to a prayer for wisdom and direction, opportunities to testify of His work in me, restful sleep, spiritual refreshment from His Word, and even "little" things like chocolate, and the anticipated arrival of my family for a weekend visit!

I'm not the determiner of the goodness of the gift. That is the decision of the Giver. How thankful I am to be able to confidently trust that He will not withhold any good thing from those that walk uprightly! (Ps. 84:11)

After a Busy Week. . .

I decided to climb a tree. Yes, the life of a graduate student has enveloped me for the past week, and I needed an outlet. My aunt and uncle have an apple tree in the back yard, and no one enjoys its gifts except the bugs and one groundhog who makes appearances for each meal. I have gone out to pick them, but most have been either hanging beyond my reach or already infested. This evening, however, after eating my dinner on the screened-in porch, I walked out to assess the possibility of climbing up, and then the extent of the reward for my labor (which turned out to be quite satisfactory, not because of the number of good apples, but because of the refreshment of a challenge completed and enjoyed). Since I was home alone, I decided not to go for the best apples which happened to be hanging farthest from the trunk and highest from the ground. But I did find a few that the insects had missed.

What does this have to do with graduate school? I'm not really sure. Maybe it is my way of keeping some balance in my life! This week has had its challenges: accompanying for a senior vocalist preparing for a very quickly-approaching recital, deciding on and researching for a large project, preparing a Beethoven sonata presentation and performance for which I have not had the length of time nor the wrist cooperation to perfect, health concerns in my family members and friends, and my own struggles of wrist pain, exhaustion, and other personality "weaknesses" (yes, these are good for me, but hard). The Lord has been so good to put these things in my life in order that my weaknesses would magnify His strength. And I also praise Him for the time He gives to take a break from graduate school life and enjoy His creation, even in an apple tree.

Painful Rejoicing

Because I had no access to a piano this past summer, adjusting to a four-hour practice day has been difficult. I have thanked the Lord for the minimal pain that I was sure would accompany the rigorous schedule. And now, in His goodness, He has seen fit to test my "continual thanksgiving" by allowing me to experience that pain. Although not substantial in light of many others' pains, I am dealing with both a physical and emotional struggle in this. For one, my fingers, wrists, and elbows hurt! But also, I believe the Lord has given me the gift to play, the opportunity to further develop it, the love of playing, and also the desire to do so for His glory. When I am hindered in furthering those pursuits, my finite mind wonders how such a hindrance could bring Him the glory I want to give. But truth reigns supreme, and I now have the opportunity to dwell on His promises of sovereignty, peace, hope, faithfulness, grace, and many others that sustain through difficult seasons. Would you pray with me that His glory would shine through this struggle, that I would joyfully persevere, and that others would see Him more clearly in my weakness?

Retreat to the Mountains

One of my friends from my homeschooling years has a "mountain house" 13 miles away which she and her family enjoy frequently. After not seeing each other more than twice during our college years, I had a great time catching up with her my second weekend here. This weekend, her mom has planned a "girls-get-together" to belatedly celebrate her birthday and graduation. Some of her aunts and cousins are coming as well, and they have invited me to join the family. So, tomorrow, I will put aside the studies of Beethoven, the piano books, the research, and enjoy a much needed respite in the beautiful mountains. Whether a small flower or a vast mountainside, God's beauty permeates the earth. I hope I never lose my appreciation of such blessings.

Beauty in Quiet Places

Today was the start of my third week of classes, yet not one day has been "routine." I have seen the Lord continue to develop the lessons He taught me in Russia. This is something I have prayed for, and something others have been praying for, so I praise the Lord for His work, and thank those of you who have had a part. The more I experience in life, the more grateful I become for the intercession of believers. What a privilege to lift up a fellow soldier before the Lord, asking Him to be the strength for the battle, the energy for the race, and then knowing that the Lord will not fail to answer according to His perfect will!
One struggle I face in the midst of the busyness is finding time to stop and appreciate the small blessings, like the beauty of a flower. The picture above is a lily from the pond in the back yard. This is the second one that has bloomed, gone through its open and close cycle according to the sun, and then withered after the third day. Its present beauty reminds me of the Lord's intimate and loving care, even of creations that quickly fade. How much more is that same care manifested to those He is conforming into His own image. I pray that I will continue to make time to be reminded of the truths found in quiet places.

Graduate School

By this Saturday, I will have been a graduate student for 13 days and will be thankful for the weekend -- in order that I might have time to begin treading through the seemingly insurmountable amount of work and piano practice. My daily schedule is full between an ideal 4 hours of practice, classes, and my assistantship work, which includes accompanying for the Madison Singers, accompanying for the symphony orchestra, and working as a secretarial assistant to Dr. Ritcher, head of the music education department. My nights are then devoted to all the reading and researching and more practicing!
The Lord has provided a good church for me to attend -- Freedom Baptist Church. Only 1/2 mile from where I live, this small but friendly group of believers has already welcomed me. I am thankful the Lord so quickly answered this prayer. It will be a needed as the opportunities for spiritual fellowship are now much fewer. But the Lord has been faithful in the past to provide what I need, and I have the confident assurance He will continue to do so, even if the needs and provisions to meet those needs are different than what I am used to or even think are the right ones. His ways are not mine, and for this I know I am to be grateful.

Graduate School Transition

I arrived in Harrisonburg, Va, yesterday at my new home for the next two years. The Lord has shown His goodness to me through providing family nearby both for my college years and now my graduate. My dad's sister and her husband, Drs. Marilou and George Johnson, both work at JMU and live 1.3 miles from the university. So I will be staying with them, Lord willing, for the duration of my master's program.
Beyond knowing my living situation, I know very little about the rest of my fall! But I will soon find out my class schedule, my assistantship responsibilities (which are now in the music education department), and everything else that will fill up my time! I am praying about a church to get involved with and have a few options that I hope to begin visiting as soon as possible. Although much is unknown to me right now, I have full confidence in God's plan and anticipate His making much of that known to me over the next few weeks. I will keep you updated as I find these out!

Russia recap

For those of you who still check this after such a long period of inactivity, I am sorry! Limited internet access in Russia provided no time for blog updates. But I am home and ready to report of an incredible experience. No other time in my life have I felt so dependent on the Lord's strength and grace and yet felt so aware of His presence, confident of His goodness, and certain of His guidance. Everything from His clear direction of where I was to spend my summer to having my suitcase lost for 19 days pointed to the importance of waiting on Him. The most impacting education I had was a chapter from Andrew Murray's book Waiting on God. The chapter, entitled "To Know His Goodness," opened my eyes to the importance of waiting -- not to receive the gift, but to learn of the Giver's goodness whether He gives the specific gift or not. This was a confrontation to my thinking, yet satisfying resolution of a long-held tension.

Every day in Russia was an adventure. The culture is extremely laid back, so I rarely new what each day would hold. I spent most of my time taking care of Caleb and Ricco, the 9 month old twins. During my stay, the Vogel family moved from their 9th story apartment to their own home. This wonderful change was also very stressful due to the amount of "fixing up" the house needed, as well as the demands of four children under four years old! I have returned more able to relax about things that before would have caused me great frustration. I am praying that I will be able to appropriate these lessons as I continue on now with school this fall.

I enjoyed just about everything I ate there, especially when I was really hungry! The Russians eat bread at every meal, drink hot tea like water, and have much later meal times than I am accustomed to. Mu last week in Russia, we were at an English Language Camp that Peter organized, and our meal times were 10am, 2pm, and 7pm (or 8, depending on if the meat people delivered on time!). Flexibility was key to my time there. : )

Because I spent most of my time with 2 babies, I did a lot of the normal dressing, changing, feeding, cleaning, and watching. Even though this was a full time job, the times of sitting on the floor with them or taking them for a walk gave me opportunities to pray and review Scripture, things that were wonderfully refreshing and sustaining in my frequent state of fatigue.

I don't think I even saw a piano while I was in Russia, but I was able to play the keyboard each Sunday at church. This ministry was one of my favorites, and, although I don't feel any more prepared for grad school in the sense of increased musical knowledge or ability, I wouldn't trade my time there for anything. I am looking forward to seeing how the Lord uses the lessons and experiences I had this summer in my next step at James Madison. I believe they will be many, and I am thankful to be able to praise the Lord for these.

Soldiers of Christ

"Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may stand against the wiles of the devil." Eph. 6:10-11
"Then comes the end, when He delivers the kingdom to God the Father, when He puts an end to all rule and all authority and power. . . . The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives is the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord." I Cor. 15: 24, 56-57

The music for our service tomorrow is centered around the soldier theme, and I have been contemplating my role as Christ's soldier. Life is certainly a mighty conflict against unnumbered foes, but courage can rise with danger because the strife will not be long. And I have the assured hope of total victory. The Victor's song is sure, but today is the noise of battle. I must fight now, confidently sure of the crown of life promised to the overcomer, as well as a future and eternal reign with the King of glory.
I must put the armor on, yet I am only strong in the strength God supplies through Christ. Soldiers must give all: total commitment, total abandonment to self. And soldiers must protect all -- full armor of God -- to "fortify the whole." The awaiting result is standing complete at last before Christ.
I must go to war with the Cross before me. If not, I fight a losing battle. The Cross is the reason I have victory, for on it Christ paid my sin as my Substitute. He rose again, conquering sin and death, so that I too might be a conqueror through Him. The battle, though intense, has the promise of triumph, giving way to a joyful song into battle.
This kind of soldier does not get to pick his battles, nor his battlefields. I am under the mercy of a loving Commander who knows what is best for me. This soldier must obey completely. Though ultimate victory is guaranteed, my disobedience results in enemy gains. This soldier must continue to fight, even if exhausted, wounded, or conflicted. I must remain faithful, trusting in God's faithfulness to me, His strength, and His merciful forgiveness of my failures. This soldier finally needs other faithful fellow soldiers. No soldier is sufficient in and of himself. I alone cannot stand up against the enemy temptations. I need what God has provided, and one of His provisions is the body of Christ.
Our sovereign Commander leads us to triumph. May we follow in joyful song, trusting every step of His battle plan, and learning to work with our fellow soldiers to bring ultimate glory to the Victor.

Ps. 62:5-6

The beach vacation is over, but I am still in Va Beach with my grandparents until tomorrow. Maybe working outside in the hot sun isn't typical "relaxation" but I have loved getting to help Gramps with the mowing and the hedge trimming (well, the clean-up from the hedge trimming). If I'm dressed to get sweaty and dirty, I love it. Sometime, I want to bale hay.

I had a refreshing visit with Kirk Lehner (youth pastor of Colonial) and his wife last night. We've been friends since I was 4. He used to visit our house on his way to and from college about 15 years ago, and we have continued to stay in touch, especially with his visits to Northland during my time there. Being encouraged, challenged, and refreshed all at once is a welcomed but privileged opportunity. I think that I will learn to appreciate that even more as I go to a secular grad school.

God's promises, not only about Himself but also about His work, remain unchanging even during the midst of circumstantial transitions. How thankful I am for this, and for His complete sufficiency whether we choose to accept it or not. But what greater peace and joy and fulfillment results from a life that is satisfied with Him alone!

"My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense: I shall not be moved." Ps.62:5-6

Our vacation week has come to an end. Mom, Buddy, and I are staying a few extra days with Gramps, Gram, and Grace, so we are still in the Va Beach area. The week was good, not only to relax and enjoy, but also to continue to grow in the Lord. I am thankful that He never takes vacation from His work in my heart. The more He works, the more I realize how much more transforming I need Him to do. I guess that is a good thing, but it is not self-satisfying. Then again, self-satisfaction minimizes need for Him, so I shouldn't want that to begin with! I have been sobered with the reality of sin, not only in me but around me. But I have been claiming His promises that He has given me everything I need for life and godliness (2 Pet. 1:3), that He is working in me giving me the desire to obey Him as well as the power I need to obey (Phil. 2:13). The life of a pilgrim is the one I am to be living. I want to, but the conflict is great. My mindset is not naturally eternal. But I praise my eternal God for patiently performing His purification of my life so that I will be a vessel fit for His unique purpose for me.

Vacation blessings

Another good day at the beach. The weather has been beautiful: not too hot, but warm enough to need sunscreen (well, maybe I discovered that a bit too late today). So, I've been thinking. . . how do I "vacation" when I am accustomed to always having something to do or somewhere to go? Reading is great, but I can only sit for so long. Working on blogs and facebooks can be fun, (and also waste a great deal of time), but this doesn't provide much lasting substance. Maybe no one else has this conflict, and for that you should be thankful. But today, after reading and thinking about a section in Lewis S. Chafer's He That is Spiritual on the concept of being dead to sin, I found Gramps and had a great discussion with him. He is so wise, yet very humble and practical. I walked away from our conversation with a greater thankfulfulness both for a godly grandfather and for a God who has given me everything I need for life and godliness.

Extended run

My cousin, Wes, and I decided to go for what we understood was a 7-mile run this morning. We got half-way and my nike+ipod revealed that we had already completed 4.09 mi. and we were just turning around to go back. Needless to say, after a 8.18mi. run, we are both a bit sore. But it was definitely worth it: early in the morning (well, 7-8am), sun shining but with a nice breeze coming off the ocean, wave noise in the background, and a cousin to run with. I did miss a few things though, especially some good hills. Those, however, are foreign to Virginia beaches. I did get to see a beautiful sunrise before we started. That was wonderful!

Beach vacation with the Olsons

This week is the bi-annual reunion of Gram and Gramps Olson's 50th anniversary. 20 of the 21 family members are enjoying a house almost right on the Virginia beach at Sandbridge. Katherine, my sister, has helped me create a blog. I hope to be able to post updates while I am in Russia (June 21-Aug. 6), and then on to grad school at JMU this fall. But until then, I will enjoy the beach, and let you enjoy as much as you can from pictures and posts.